Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Wednesdays with Willington: Volume II

Greetings Friends,

Thanks again for your submissions this week. Let's get it on!


Graham writes:
Frank,
I am currently job hunting. I have heard news reports about how wonderful the job market is for new graduates. My experiences have been very different, as in I can't find a job and have applied for numerous jobs. Why do you think this is?


Well Graham, there are two reasons for this. The first being that you are a member of the America First God Squad, and who wants to hire someone who believes that the world was created in 6 days?
The main reason, however, is George W. Bush. Move to Canada and work should quickly come calling. Sorry, but you brought it on yourself. Hope that helps!



Theodore Trumblebunks writes:
Why do you and other liberals hate the flag and want to see it burned by opposing the amendment?


If I have learned anything in my cultural sensitivity class, it’s that flags are a greatly combustible item. Every time I find myself on the street for Franklin Willington’s one day protest in the life of a homeless person I’m sure to bring a flag to start a fire for warmth.

Why do you hate the poor?


Jack X writes
Dear Franklin Willington,
What are your stances on gun control?


The government should control all the guns in this country. Why? Because they are currently owned by the America First God Squad. We all like to imagine that guns are disabled with flowers and drum circles, but lets face it, they’re not. Until a democratic government systematically collects all guns no one is safe.



That’s it for this weeks edition of Wednesdays with Willington. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s review of Superman Returns, the biggest blockbuster since Brokeback Mountain.
-Franklin Willington

1 comment:

Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. said...

The flag is not meant for that. The poor wouldn't be so poor if they worked harder. Duh.