Wednesday with Willington (taking down Teddy edition)

Greetings friends
Today's edition of Wednesday with Willington is clearly planned to destroy that Trumblebunks fellow and bring down his Thrusday with Theodore. Hope you enjoy his demise.

How loudly did you cheer Hugo Chavez's despicable remarks about our divinely-inspired President today?-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq

As I have said before Teddy, I only by my gas straight off the boat from Venezuela. So of course I was thrilled, I can’t tell you how long I’ve been saying the same things that Hugo said yesterday. Finally a voice of moderation steps to the plate and calls Bush a Devil, now I’m hoping that when he made the Sign of the Cross, that he only did so in jest. I don’t know his personal religious feelings, but as you know I am strongly against church and state.


Jack X is apparently having a religious crisis. He has a problem dealing with changes that his priest has made to the mass. So this week he asks what should i do--go elsewhere or face the music or confront or something else?

It’s quiet clear Jack, that you hate Jesus just as much as I do. He’s a fraud, and so is his church. It’s time you start worshipping number 1: Al Gore. That’s right, come over to the church of Al. Al is all you need to face the dangers of the Bush administration head on. Just pray to Gore every night and you’ll be ok Jack.

A New Attack

Greetings Friends,

Today I received a grave threat to our nation as a link from a friend http://www.armorofgodpjs.com/

It's quite clear what the America First God Squad is doing. They want to get after our children with trendy pajamas! How dare they try to poison our children's minds with talk of how Jesus can protect them from evil?!?!

They made a mistake folks, they put their battle plan on their website for old Frankoin to see it:

"Although we are a new company, our desire is to growinto a well-known Christian Organization whose main goal is to reach as many children as possible by providing the Word of God, offering top quality products and excellent customer service along with offering parents the means and support to help their children grow in the knowledge of Jesus Christ."

I don't want children to know Jesus. Jesus was nothing but a criminal whom the right has vindicated by calling him "savior." Of course they would honor Jesus. He convinced a tax collector to quit his job and follow him. How exactly were they supposed to help the poor without tax money? I guess Jesus believed in trickle-down economic policy.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. That's why I, Franklin Willington am designing Franklin Willington Saves the World Pajamas for kids and adults:

As you can see, the girls pajamas come with pants, while the men will come with Capri's....which are great to sleep in. Keep in mind these are rough designs, we may change the dots on the boy's pajamas to flowers and add some lace later on.

Send in your requests for this new item to franklinwillington@yahoo.com

-Franklin Willington

Wednesday with Willington Weekend Edition

Greetings friends,

I apologize once again for my lateness. I recently started a new job to go along with my educational responsibilities. As you all know, there's only so much of Franklin to go around.

But alas, I bring you the late edition of Wednesday with Willington

This week, Teddy asks:

Willington, Sunday, Vice President Cheney said that the Bush Administration has done a "helluva job" in fighting the war on terror. Do you agree, or do you wish to appease the terrorists?



What do you think I want Teddy? If we appease them, they will realize that we're really not that bad. Then they won't attack us anymore. Take an international relations class Ted.



That's it for this week. Keep the questions coming
-Franklin Willington

This week's true patriot

Greetings Friends,

So football season continued to roll on this past weekend friends, and I want to give you this week's top 10 teams in the country

1. LSU- Justin Vincent is a formidable heisman candidate due to his proficient blocking on passing downs

2. USC- The best team from my favorite city

3 UCLA- The second best team from my favorite city

4. Cal- They're from California...any other questions?

5. Stanford- See # 4

6. Wyoming- The QB has the vision of Dick Cheney on a quail farm.

7. Rutgers- They're from New York

8. The Saints- Reggie Bush is from California

9. Harvard- Ivey League

10. Yale- Same

And this week's true patriot is Pete Carroll

He's led West Coast Football into the national spotlight

Remember friends, email your questions for Wednesdays with Willington to franklinwillington@yahoo.com

-Franklin Willington

Teddy Trumblebumpkins is on the Run!!!!

Greetings friends,

Today is a great day for America. Conservatives in congress admitted that some of the evidence that led to our war with Iraq was "fabricated." Let's face it, Bush lied, and finally republicans are seeing it.

Teddy Trumblebumpkins on his blog today while talking about the war in Iraq, mentioned all "that shit" that our boys are fighting in. If the war was going well, there wouldn't be shit. At last, Trumblebumpkins admits that we are not winning the war.

I want Teddy to join me in calling for the resignation of Donald Rumsfeld. Let's get someone into office who can clean "that shit" up. It's time to cut through the doublespeak and let's get someone who is going to be honest with us, like Al Franken.

I, Franklin Willington, call for Donald Rumsfeld's resignation. I also support Al Franken for Secretary of Defense. Join me in my call.

-Franklin Willington

Wednesday with Willington Reloaded

Greetings friends,

I have to apologize for my absence lately. As you all know, I consider myself a lifetime learner, and with school having started recently I've been bogged down with work, school, and saving the world by myself. It's hard work.

Without further ado, I bring you the rebirth of Wednesdays with Willington, leaner, meaner and more insightful than ever.

From our good friend Jack X

What needs to be done, if anything, in order to expedite the recovery of Hurricane Katrina?

Thanks for the question Jack. I've done a lot of research, mostly watching the news and listening to Kanye West, and let me tell you. I have the answer. You see, when Kanye said that George Bush hates black people, he was really just cracking the surface of a systemmic problem that plagues our government. That problem: Republicans. You see, Republicans hate black people. That's why Democrats need to take back Congress. New Orleans will only be rebuilt if there are Democrats controlling every single level of government. Republicans have long held down New Orleans and it's citizens, and it's time to take a stand. That's why I'm officially calling off my ban on liberal voting (remember when I wanted Franklin Willington day?). That's right liberals, it's time to start lining up for the November 7th elections. It's your duty.



The Rethuglican writes

If you had to pick just one, which moment in the aftermath of Katrina was President George W. Bush's strongest?-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

I don't know what moment was the strongest Teddy. Maybe it was when he was playing guitar while people were dying. Or maybe it was when he flew overhead on airforce one for his first post-Katrina photo-op. Or maybe it was when he stood in Jackson Square and promised to actually rebuild the city and create new opportunities for it's residents to become homeowners. One year, and vastly inflated home prices later, many of those residents still reside in FEMA trailers outside the city. Which of these do you view as his strongest moment Teddy?


Friends, I am glad to be with you once again. There are exciting changes ahead for FWSW. Stay tuned for our current features, The Most Overrated Presidents, True Patriots and Wednesdays with Willington. And keep an eye out for some new features and attitudes.

-Franklin Willington

It's that time of the year

Greetings friends,

The town is covered with the smell of grills, jambalaya, and exhaust from traffic grinding to a halt. That's right folks, it's football season. And with football season comes my favorite time of the year: Protest season.

Every year I fire up the Prius, load up my bullhorn and posterboards and head down to LSU to protest the purple and gold confederate flag. You see, some people protest people having the flags, I protest those protesting the right of the protestors to protest.

The rebel flag is a serious issue, which I refuse to take a stand on. You see, I feel that my most important job is not to actually address the real issue, but to find side step that issue, just like Chancellor O'Keefe.

He is a shining example of doing nothing to address an actual issue. He said he's against the flag, but refuses to ban it, straddling the fence like a real patriot. Sean O'Keefe is my idol when it comes to taking a stand for free speech by taking no stand at all.

Sean O'Keefe, a true American Patriot:


-Franklin Willington

New Orleans Remembered

Greetings Friends,

This image that I created is all the message I will leave you with today, I will just remind you that tomorrow is another edition of Wednesdays with Willington, please send me a Katrina related question to franklinwillington@yahoo.com .

-Franklin Willington

This Week's True Patriot: Ray Nagin

Greetings Friends,

This week I will be focusing on a subject that is near and dear to me. Tomorrow is the one year anniversiary of 8/29. This week, I feel it appropriate to name Ray Nagin a true patriot.


You see, when Bush was playing guitar in San Diego, before flying over New Orleans for an Air Force One photo-op, Ray Nagin was down in the thick of things on 8/29. When people wouldn't listen, Ray just spoke louder.

Sure Ray has said some blunt things in the aftermath of 8/29, but they needed to be said. Everyone wants a chocolate New Orleans. Chocolate is much more pleasant than the smell the city had before!

When Ray was challenged by an America-First-God-Squad reporter on the speed of recovery in post 8/29 New Orleans, he pointed out that the World Trade Center is still nothing but a hole in the ground. If you don't respect Ray after 8/29, don't expect any in return.

Another thing that I respect about Ray Nagin is that he's a recovering Republican. That's right folks. Ray used to be one of them way back before 8/29. He supported George Bush in 2000 and Bobby Jindal in 2003. He wasn't a democrat until he decided to run for mayor, but now, after 8/29, I'm proud to say that he's in my corner.


Don't change Ray! Keep telling them like it is, even if they don't like it. The America-first-God-Squad media will keep attacking you, but I'll always have your back. Ray Nagin, true American patriot.

-Franklin Willington

The Overrated Presidents Series

Greetings Friends,

I am pleased to introduce a new series to the blog. I'm going to point out some of the most overrated Presidents in the history of the country. Not all of them may be obvious, and we will certainly have some disagreements. If you would like to voice your opinion on my choices, feel free to email me franklinwillington@yahoo.com or just feel free to post a comment. I will also take recommendations.

This week's most overrated President: Abraham Lincoln.



Abraham Lincoln gets a lot of credit for what he did. Saving the Union, freeing the slaves, blah, blah blah, etc. What people fail to talk about is what he didn't do.

Abraham Lincoln completely ignored foreign policy! Because of Abraham Lincoln, we lost ground to those that want to do us harm. He failed to secure our ports, and under his watch more Americans died on our soil than in any other single event in our history.

Now the save-the-union-first crowd will say that he did what he had to do in order to save this great experiment in democracy. But I think Lincoln failed to protect Americans. Does this remind you of anyone else? George W. Bush and the modern Republicans perhaps? Like Bush, he talked a big game, but in the end he failed to deliver. That's a Republican for you.

How can the America first God squad historians defend his non-existant foreign policy? I demand that Lincoln be put in his place. Honest Abe was an honest failure.

-Franklin Willington

Fighting them over there

Greetings Friends!

I want to put a challenge to you, the true patriots out there that are helping me Save the World. It's time to take our message to the masses!

I urge you to go to Conservative blogs and message boards and tell them why they're wrong. Tell them why George Bush has our country in a downward spiral. And when you find them and get them on the run, point them here, to Franklin Willington Saves the World.

Wherever there are conservatives attacking you, show them the truth. Link them here, to your hub for all that is wrong with America.

Let's start by taking it to Teddy Trumblebunks! It's time to take over the web!

Remember to keep the faith (in yourself)

-Franklin Willington

Update: War on Freedom Bandz

Greetings friends,

I've been keeping the administration on edge with the growing success of the War on Freedom Bandz. Ever since calling for a boycott on American Made products, the economy has stalled.

Let me say that I'm proud of the progress that we've made. And today I am proud to make an announcement:

That's right folks: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!! We did it!

Theodore Trumblebunks admitted defeat for his side in announcing "Teddy's Troopers." You see, if you join his "fan club," you get a bumper sticker, which of course must be manufactured in China!

Woohoo! We did a heckuva job! I am proud of you patriots! It's a great day when Teddy Trumble-America First God Squad-Bunks admits his own defeat. Thanks to you, we have Saved the World once again!

-Franklin Willington

Wednesdays with Willington Volume VIII

Greetings Friends!

I know you've been itching with anticipation for the next edition of Wednesdays with Willington. Let me say that I am quite pleased that in my answers, I am offering life changing information to you, dear readers. Can you believe this site is free?

Theodore Trumblebunks writes:
Willington,
Do you actually oppose Fox News' suggestion that there should be a separate Muslim line at the airport? Why do you hate freedom and security?

Of course not Trumblebunks, I believe that we should treat them like royalty. Why subject our visitors to the same treatment that we get? You’re a big fan of that Jesus fellow, aren’t you? Didn’t he say that you should to “turn the other cheek?” It’s in the bible. So when Arabs get their on line, the screeners need to just turn the other cheek, it’s what Jesus would do.


Since Time asked, what is your take on Hillary?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

You dare to speak the great one’s name? Bill’s wife is, in my opinion, the greatest human being in the history of mankind. She’s the perfect picture of femininity. So strong and brave, yet so gentle, sweet, and beautiful. Let me just say, I’d like to tap that. She’s got my vote.


Jack X writes

Dear Frank,
Let's say Hollywood decides to make a movie about Hurricane Katrina--the storm, the political humps associated with it, etc. Which actors do you think should play George W. Bush, Kathleen Blanco, Michael Brown, Ray Nagin, and other people associated with the storm (such as evacuees, Aaron Broussard, Mary Landrieu, David Vitter, Haley Barbour, etc.) and why?
I hope that question is interesting for you and you enjoy answering it.


There is a movie Jack. it was made by Spike Lee. It tells the truth about Katrina, like how George Bush dropped bombs out of Air Force one and blew up the levees. Did you know that Kanye West is in the documentary? I remember when he was standing there, you know at the superdome helping get aid to people and getting them out of harms way, and saying that George Bush hate’s black people. That Kanye, he’s quite the giver. I live by his workout plan.


Well folks, that does it for this weeks Wednesday with Willington. Keep the questions flowing and stay tuned for an update on the War on Freedom Bandz!

-Franklin Willington

This week's true patriot

Greetings Friends!

This week's true patriot is a real American Hero. Aside from being a former POW, he also has the ability to flip from hard-core Republican to moderate whenever the poll's say it's in his favor. This week's true patriot is John McCain.

You see, I admire McCain. No one has straddled both sides of the fence better than ol' Johnny boy. He's been a die hard supporter of the Bush administration and especially the war in Iraq.

McCain is now saying he believes the administration has made a mistake by not telling the American people how tough the war in Iraq would be. Bingo Senator, now you see it my way.

When McCain says that it would be a mistake to set a date for withdrawal, he is saying that he believes we need to fluctuate our strength. We need to pull our troops out and put them back in several times until our boys are ready to break the surface of the situation.

I want to make myself clear on the Iraq topic. We should have never gone into Iraq in the first place, but now that we are there, I don't believe in pulling out early. We have to stay inserted deep inside Iraq until she reaches her climax. John McCain agrees with me, that is until the public believes Bush is doing a good job with the war.

-Franklin Willington

p.s. remember to send quesitions for Wednesdays with Willington to franklinwillington@yahoo.com

Historic day for America

Greetings Friends!

I have to apologize for the lack of Wednesdays with Willington this week. I've been a little under the weather and much like T.O., I don't know how to post at less than 100%. I will make it up to you next Wednesday.

Today is a great day friends, Snakes on a Plane is now in theaters! I've been waiting on this all summer. You see, some may say that the snakes are terrorists, but I believe that the snakes are Republicans.

That's right George Bush, Dick Cheney, Karl Rove, Bill Frist, they're all there. Samuel L Jackson is of course Howard Dean, leading the American people safely through the dangers posed by the republican party.

Enough is Enough, we've had it with these mothaf'n snakes running our mothaf'n government!




Watch out Republicans, Samuel L. Jackson is coming for you!


-Franklin Willington

Reminder: Wednesdays with Willington

Greetings Friends,

I just want to remind everyone that tomorrow is another edition of Wednesdays with Willington. Remember to send your questions to franklinwillington@yahoo.com

-Franklin Willington

This Weeks True Patriot

Greetings Friends,

It's that time for another edition of my "true patriot" series. This week was very difficult, until, like an angel, this patriot's story fell in my lap. This week's true patriot, is America's Mother, Cindy Sheehan.

While it's no news to you friends, Ms. Sheehan has been leading the anti-war movement since losing her son in the Iraq war.

I would have saluted her earlier, but now Ms. Sheehan has truly earned the respect of us all. First she bought land near Bush's ranch in Crawford Texas, and now Mrs. Sheehan has made an even greater sacrifice.

Cindy was on a liquid diet to protest the war in Iraq for more than a month, and only ended her Ghandi-esque strike when she was hospitalized in Seattle after protesting for several days. Then she was hospitalized again in Dallas on Friday.

Talk about committment! I dare conservatives to attack this poor victim who has risen above and beyond the call of duty. She is truly a patriot of the highest degree!

I, Franklin Willington, would like to announce that I will be making a similar sacrifice. I will not drink any of my vast French Wine collection until George Bush brings the troops home. If it's not done in the next week, I will then give up my cheese assortment. It's time for bold action friends.

Thank you Cindy Sheehan for being a true patriot!

-Franklin Willington

Great Idea by Gov. Blanco

Greetings Friends,

As you all know, I love taxes. When the Governor of New Jersey was in a standoff with the legislature over raising the sales tax there, I suggested that he wasn't asking for enough of an increase. Now, here in my home state, Gov. Kathleen Blanco has proposed to place a toll on Interstates in the Southern part of the state.

Now, anyone familiar with South Louisiana, in particular my current home of Baton Rouge, knows quite well that the interstate is really the lifeline of the area. The city is spread out across a large area, so getting from one place of interest to another can be impossible without use of these major roadways.

Governor Blanco however apparently is aiming too low. She was seeking a 1.00 toll on cars and 2.50 on trucks. And get this, you could pay only half of that if you paid ahead of time. What kind of quality tax is that? I'm ready to do my part, Governor, step up and call on the rest of the state to do theirs. I say we should all pay 5.00 for each ride on the interstate.

In honor of this great proposal, I stood today along I-10 with a collection basket asking drivers during rush-hour traffic to pay 1.00 to use our magnificent road system. I'm considering spreading this effort out to surface streets and shopping malls. If you want to use our public roadways, you should be prepared to pay. From the looks of drivers on the interstate, they loved my work today. I can't tell you the last time I had so many people wave to me. Some apparently even thought my idea was #1.

Now when I got home from my work today, I was shocked to see on the news that Governor Blanco had folded to pressure from Republican "Hurricane-victim-first" Senator David Vitter. Yesterday Vitter began crying that this plan would hurt those trying to evacuate during hurricanes, and that it would also hurt business and trucking interests. Boo hoo Senator Vitter, I think after 8/29 people should be willing to pay to get out of the path of the hurricane. As a matter of fact, I propose that we double the toll during hurricane evacuations. What an opportunity!

So Governor Blanco, man up and tell Senator Vitter that you don't care what he thinks. Help us all by charging us more to live. It's the least we can do for the service that you've provided this state.

-Franklin Willington

Wednesdays with Willington Volume VII

Greetings Friends!

Today’s email revolves mostly around the Lieberman primary.

Jack X writes:

Do you believe Ned Lamont's victory emboldened the terrorists in England?

Jack, nothing could be further from the truth. Ned Lamont is a patriot. Terrorists fear Ned Lamont. They know that if Ned Lamont is elected we will pull out of Iraq and scale back security. That’s exactly what the terrorists don’t want to see. They want a challenge against our heightened state of security. The terrorists love George Bush and Joe Lieberman.


Theodore Trumblebunks writes:

Willington,

How did you and your "partners" celebrate the loss of our democracy last night (i.e., the Lamont win)?

The first thing I did was sit in a leather chair and eat a bowl of Cocoa puffs just to mock Lieberman and Colbert and their ilk. Then I ran naked through the streets waving the Connecticut flag. Sure, my neighbors thought it was weird that I had a Connecticut flag, but I’ve been preparing for VC day for awhile. I don’t know when I’ll come down off of this high Trumblebunks!

Thanks for the submissions friends, stay tuned for more on the current terror situation. Remember to go ahead and send in your emails for next week to franklinwillington@yahoo.com

-Franklin Willington

Wednesdays with Willington Delayed

Greetings Friends,

I have to apologize, but I must postpone Wednesdays with Willington. At the earliest it will be up by late tonight but most likely tomorrow. Please send your questions to franklinwillington@yahoo.com

-Frankin Willington